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Slave Barcode

Ever feel like a slave to the corporate workforce? Is "the man" holding you down? Here are the top 10 reasons you should feel enthusiastic about your role as a corporate drone:

10) Through your employee pension plan stock options, you now own .00000000000000001% of a congressman!

9) If you're not stoked over the executives' all-expense paid Bermuda vacation, you're just not grasping the concept of "trickle-down morale."

8) Being addressed by name and personally recognized for your accomplishments is for sissies.

7) Important brain-space is freed up for concentrating on football stats and "Baywatch" re-runs.

6) Six 16-hour days of programming always followed by a conjugal visit.

5) The never-ending amusement of seeing how many times you can work the phrase 'cwazy wabbit' into corporate documents without it being noticed.

4) Your company's HMO has now taken penicillin off the experimental drug list.

3) Road to Hell seems much more pleasant when riding in a new Lexus SUV.

2) Comforting realization that the CEO's wallet is so fat, you're not *actually* kissing his ass.

1) A paycheck *and* a chance to pee in a cup!

Express your enthusiasm to be a cog in the corporate machine with this cotton heavyweight shirt.